Humans Are Seekers

It’s instinct

Seek, and ye shall find. How often do we hear this in life? It’s from the book of Matthew in the Bible and has made its way into average conversations. Whether you are into religion or not, it’s repeated often. This trifling little saying isn’t necessarily wrong, but I suppose it also depends on what you seek. 

We begin our lives seeking love. If our parents don’t satiate that need, we will eventually look to find it elsewhere. 

Some of us seek power. Having autonomy over our own lives is where most of us stop seeking, but others go further. Those who have harnessed power may gain it by taking advantage of others, whether that’s by making laws which are unfair, by breaking the law, through manipulation, or under the guise of religion.  

We definitely seek answers to life’s troubles. Some may find it in a bottle. Some may find it through a therapist. Others may, again, find it in religion. 

When it comes to religion, finding the answers can become quite confusing. We may be asked to go against our instincts and blindly have faith and give money to a church. At worst, our value system may become so skewed that we view our learned ways as the only right way, even if these values are manipulated to infringe on the rights of others. The easiest way to justify hate is because of religion. 

We seek ways to relax. Again, some find that a drink takes the edge off. Or perhaps we seek a greater escape from life, and we go on a vacation. Maybe we dig deeper and practice meditation of some kind. Or maybe we simply enjoy a little spa day.

We seek safety. A life lived on the edge in that space between fight or flight isn’t just unpleasant, it’s toxic to our bodies. Imagine a life without a safe space you can claim as your own. 

Some of us seek justice, personally or for others.

We seek pleasure. Good food, sweets, sex, warmth, a good book or movie; all of these can help us enjoy life a bit more. 

We seek physical beauty. Maybe it’s in ourselves. Maybe it’s in what surrounds us, be it nature, our home, or our partners. 

Treasures, however, are my favorite things to seek. 

I brought up to my therapist that I’ve become rather addicted to thrift store shopping. She admitted that she also has this habit, and explained that we are seekers by nature.

I clutter my home with these treasures. Lately, it’s been books, art, furniture, and trinkets. By adding these things to my space, I create change and beauty, and thus comfort. 

We are born to seek comfort. We literally cry for this as infants. But we also live in a capitalistic society which has conditioned us to seek stuff. Lots of it. And all of it to fit in. 

Personally, I was most influenced by the desire to fit in during my teenage years. It was so important to possess the latest fashionable clothing to not feel poor or weird. Did I love my clothes from The Limited? I don’t know. It’s what I needed to wear to fit in with my peers. 

Maybe it’s just easier for someone to tell us what we should seek instead of trying to figure it out ourselves. Whether it’s religious leaders, advertising agencies, or our news media, there’s always someone waiting to influence us. 

There are even influencers who dare us to buck this system. Meditation, yoga, nature… are any of these answers to our woes? Perhaps. But the solution to our seeking nature should be our own to foster the most value and significance. 

Most of all, I think humans seek connection. We are meant to be social creatures. For as much as we strive to be strong individuals, it’s connecting with others that restores meaning to our lives. Be it friends, a lover, your faith, or validation of our life’s purpose, we need tangible relationships with others to feel complete. 

Whatever you are seeking, I hope you find it, and that it brings you joy. 

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What do you seek in life? It’s likely to change depending on your stage in your journey. I’d love to hear your thoughts!

As always, I hope you all are safe and healthy.